Description
Condition - Very Good
The item shows wear from consistent use, but it remains in good condition and functions properly. Item may arrive with damaged packaging or be repackaged. It may be marked, have identifying markings on it, or have minor cosmetic damage. It may also be missing some parts/accessories or bundled items.
War of the Orcs: World war against ancient humans
"Epic story!" "A great adventure!" "Funny fantasy!" "Impossible to put down!" "Great book!" "Compelling reading." "Delightful!" Bigger, stronger, and faster than men, orcs united last winter to exterminate humanity. Forming huge armies with direwolves, orcs are overwhelming the world. No man stops the slaughter, so a precocious princess sets aside her throne to ally the kingdoms of men, elf, dwarf, trolls, and giants. Soaring on her eagle, she must defeat not just orc armies, but traitors in her mist. Orcs are exterminating humanity and the biggest thing standing in their way is a little girl with serious skills.
EXCERPTS: “She’s just a little girl!†her mother objected. That pissed off the 8-year old: “No, mama. I am not just a little girl. I’m as good as any boy and I’ll be better than most men.â€
He wrapped his claw around her neck and lifted her off the ground. She tried remembering her best orc insults. “You look like a goblin. You smell like a dwarf. You dress like an elf.†Well, that really pissed him off. Especially since she yelled it loud enough for his pack to hear.
“Mom killed a thousand orcs before a lame horse did her in. I can still see that grotesque orc with mom’s intestines in his mouth, before I put an arrow down his throat.â€
The terrified giant lunged towards the nearest threat and smacked it back into the 10,000th century. That orc literally splattered his mate, who howled in horror.
Elves live millennia, but don’t breed much because the mother rarely survives the birth; and the older the mother, the less likely the survival. Birth was the greatest cause of death among elves. Despite their long lifespan, the irony never got old.
“It’s almost dawn, so orcs will find us when they look for breakfast.†Benny agreed. “That’s why I’m riding with the rapid-response unit. When you’re deep in shit, I’m your shovel.â€
Other than the occasional sea serpent or giant octopus, no one messed with trolls in Middle Earth. Floating to conserve energy, Bisi watched the battle from the safety of the sea when something big swam under her. A moment later a kraken snatched an orc in its huge conical teeth and pulled it under. She screamed for her eagle.
A stolen hatchet landed in his lower back -- the irony would hit him later. Howling in pain, he put a foot next to his sword and pulled it out of that orc, while the bastard watched in amazement. Benny swung blindly, ironically piercing another orc in the eye.
With an executioner’s ax in one paw and a spear in the other, the giant faced ten orcs with various weapons. One step for giant was one giant leap for anyone else. As soon as he moved forward, the orcs behind him attacked. Smarter than the average giant, the big guy turned and “cleared his tail†as the tactic was called.