Living with an Alcoholic Husband: A true account of living with and without a husband addicted to alcohol
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Living with an Alcoholic Husband: A true account of living with and without a husband addicted to alcohol
“To me the sound of a metal bottle cap unscrewing against a glass bottle is the worst sound in the world.
To my husband it is heaven.â€
This true account is my story. My personal observations and feelings as I lived with a husband addicted to alcohol, on a roller coaster ride of hope and despair, love and loathing, embarrassment and anger, dreading each day. I was isolated, confused and upset that I was not doing enough to help him. You become worn down by the windscreen wiper mentality. The good guy, bad guy, drinking, not drinking, telling the truth, lying, worrying, hope, please not this time, maybe he will stop – or maybe I am going mad – perhaps it is me.
This is the life I have written about. How I slowly came to realize that I was always waiting, wanting him to change. Trying to change him. Wrong. It had to be me who changed. I describe how I reached these conclusions, the choices I made and acted upon, to improve my life. Without implementing change, everything will stay the same as it is now. In writing this book I hope that some one else who lives with an alcoholically dependant person can be helped.
We are not going mad. We did not cause the problem. We alone cannot change the alcoholic. We must change ourselves in order to get our life back.
Table of Contents Introduction Was he always like That? How it is Now The Windscreen Wiper Effect Putting the Alcoholic first – Always The False Front A Life Dominating Problem They Belittle and Embarrass Someone to Talk to Both partners become Ill My Concrete Umbrella Two Inseparable Personalities Energy or the Lack of It Isolation Detox Units and Hospitals When is a Good Time? Antabuse Cancer Obligation They Must be Responsible What will They Think? Hospital Staff We Don’t Understand Trust Acting a Part Not All the Answers Is This as Good as it Gets? Video Rewind Slow Realization First Small Steps Beginning to Change Contentment Questions Keep Seeking the Truth Further Change No More More on Values Detachment To Leave or To Stay Communication The Two Choices To Return or Not Will He Die Without Me? My Clear Conscious Whether They Change or Not Yes I Have a Problem Individual Responsibility Alcoholics are Not Fools Maintaining the Façade AA Our God The True Personality Al Anon Let Go and Let God Accept and Learn Sickness or Disease? Cancer and Diabetes A Tangled Mess A Foot in Each Camp The Wall They Do Change Something to Avoid The Trap Now – Not in the Future Those Two Days Looking After Yourself The Heavy Lump of Dread A Journal Professional People Declutter Simplify 34 Years is a Long Time Books Future Help AA is not for everyone Further Reading The Final Chapter
